that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
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