i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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