youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Randomize
