hotel room ftw
omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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