Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
did you just send me my own nude
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
