fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Farmville is her only friend.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Let the clothes fall where they may.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
