spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
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