She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
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