I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
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