is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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