YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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