What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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