i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
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