you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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