I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
did you just send me my own nude
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
