Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (305): View more from Florida

  I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (305): I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang". http://tfl.nu/9dw0
  Replies (68) Good night (26124) Bad night (1547)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes" http://tfl.nu/jvdp
  Replies (14) Good night (4986) Bad night (772)
• Favorite

  (912): View more from Georgia

  I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (912): I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight. http://tfl.nu/g7kq
  Replies (31) Good night (7467) Bad night (832)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti. http://tfl.nu/166m
  Replies (21) Good night (1314) Bad night (6762)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.

  (516): View more from New York

  was the water running?

  (917): View more from New York City

  yeah but he said he knows how to swim

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower. (516): was the water running? (917): yeah but he said he knows how to swim http://tfl.nu/akph
  Replies (10) Good night (6479) Bad night (1313)
• Favorite

  (305): View more from Florida

  If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (305): If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls. http://tfl.nu/m95d
  Replies (8) Good night (5870) Bad night (1218)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin http://tfl.nu/l2xr
  Replies (11) Good night (5975) Bad night (1193)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck. http://tfl.nu/69rd
  Replies (17) Good night (8075) Bad night (2252)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game. http://tfl.nu/v9p4
  Replies (4) Good night (2115) Bad night (949)
• Favorite

  (269): View more from Michigan

  I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (269): I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class http://tfl.nu/65qj
  Replies (7) Good night (2650) Bad night (702)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  Was I asleep on the ride home?

  (1-512): View more from Texas

  Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): Was I asleep on the ride home? (1-512): Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face. http://tfl.nu/zq2f
  Replies (4) Good night (790) Bad night (523)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (408): I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed http://tfl.nu/4u9t
  Replies (0) Good night (606) Bad night (301)
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (601): Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life. http://tfl.nu/h9xw
  Replies (1) Good night (552) Bad night (333)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before. http://tfl.nu/g8nu
  Replies (4) Good night (345) Bad night (694)
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (281): So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition. http://tfl.nu/1z8i
  Replies (0) Good night (459) Bad night (186)

Randomize