Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
