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Rock
Scissors
Fuck
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
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