You really coming over, don't trick.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
