Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
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