Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
