As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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