so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Randomize