I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
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