i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Randomize
