Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Idk if I want to put a bra on
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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