My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
