she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
