I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
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I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
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She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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