Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i just had sex bonerless
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Randomize
