Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize