i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
being pregnant is like rehab
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize