operation harelip BJ is a go
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
false alarm, still single
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
