ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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