Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
