I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
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