I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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