I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize