is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
