We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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