that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
No subtext here. People are naked.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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