Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Randomize
