Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering