bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
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