I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize
