Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
I just made out with a guy for $7.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize