Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Randomize