We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
