For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
