It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
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