awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Bring me that man meat
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
