she was so not down for the gang bang
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
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