I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
Randomize